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Johnny Carson
Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.
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Johnny Carson
For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off.
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Johnny Carson
I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.
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Johnny Carson
If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.
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Johnny Carson
If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
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Johnny Carson
Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined.
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